A DIFFERENT KIND OF POST

I have heard so many stories of unhappy relationships, fear of losing the love in someone's life, cheating, sadness of uncertainty.  I felt inspired to write this to honour those who are questioning themselves, who think they need to change so keep their love..  Let me know what you think...

ME

I will not give up any part of me

To have a small part of you

If you don’t value me just as I am

It is not me you value at all

You want to mold me and change me

You want to make me fit your plan

I’m not clay, not sand, not pen in hand

I am polished stone, silk and fire

I am strong and soft and fierce

I face the sun, the warmth flows from me

I am me and I will not give up any part of me

To have a small part of you

I do not want to share you, I do not want to cry

I do not want to wonder if it is truth or lies

I am not an option if someone better doesn’t come

Love me for me, love me as I am

I will not give up any part of me

To have a small part of you

www,unleashtheknow.com      andrea@unleashtheknow.com

What Can a Life Coach Do For Me?

Do you ever watch Dr. Phil and say to yourself “I could have figured that out”?  I think that most people do, at least most of the time.  What you cannot offer however, is the resources that he has at hand.  I am not always sure that what he offers is the best solution but it is at least a beginning.  The real problem is that, in order to get those resources from him, you need to go on his internationally seen show and put all of your business out there for the world to see.

Fighting between family members happens in every family.  It can lead to estrangement, divorce and deep resentment and regrets.  Causes can appear to be money, lack of communication, or disagreements between parents and children.

Why do I say that these causes can “appear to be”?  How many questions do you ask yourself before getting into a fight between you and your family member?  I am not referring to questions such as “how dare he” or “what is her problem” .  The solutions often lie in the questions that you should be asking.  It is so difficult to ask the right questions when in the heat of anger.  How do you know what the right questions are?

The role of a Life Coach is to help you find the right questions, how to ask them and when to ask them.  At times, it is also about who to ask the questions to.  Relationships always have their good times and their bad times.  Whether you can move past the bad times with the love that lies beneath the surface or not, may depend on these questions.  Estrangement between a parent and child, is the saddest of all.   No one wins in that situation.  There are certain specific skills which seem obvious but which are not often innate.  Your private family business should remain between you and the person who can guide you towards resolution.  A Life Coach will ensure privacy and confidentiality.  A Life Coach will show you how to find solutions.  A Life Coach will not hold your hand in a kumbya way but will show you how to move forward in a positive way.

If you have a relationship in your life that is going through rough times but which is too important to you to let go without trying, contact me athttp://www.unleashtheknow.com  or write to me at  andrea@unleashtheknow.com  The solutions are within reach.  Invest in them now to save yourself the pain and cost of the alternatives.

Love of family and friends is the single most valuable thing we have in our lives.  I agree with Dr. Phil on one thing.  Awareness without action is worthless.  Act today….I look forward to hearing from you.

http://www.unleashtheknow.com     andrea@unleashtheknow.com

Life is truly what you make it.....How is your life going??

If you are anything like me, you listen to your friends talk about their hardships.  You read hard luck stories on social media.  We watch heart wrenching stories on the news.  It seems like everyone has a story, pain and heartbreak.  We have all suffered loss of family, friends, loved ones.  It seems that everyday there is something about bullying or depression in a public forum or discussion board.  So with all of these stories, is there anyone who doesn't have a story?  The fact is that NO....there is no one who does not have a story of difficulty.  The difference is that some people find the joy in life and some find the sadness.  

Before I go further, let me tell you a few things about me.  I was bullied from grade one to grade five.  I was inappropriately touched by an "uncle"  My parents didn't want to hear about it.....and I never felt more alone.  I suffered the death of my only friend at age 9 and now have fibromyalgia.  I was a single parent of three, abandoned by both the father and my family.  But life is AMAZING!!!!  I  am so blessed and my life is filled with joy.  How can I say that?  Because I CHOOSE to.  I am not a victim.  I have no regrets.  I have made a decision to be grateful.for the good and beautiful things and people in my life.  This was not a conscious decision, it was a way of life.  Of course I have cried oceans worth of tears.  I get angry when bad things happen.  I wonder why things do not work out sometimes.  In other words, I am human.  When really terrible things happen, I give myself 24 hours to be hurt, angry and frustrated.  Then I take the negative energy and use it to propel myself forward.  I find solutions.  I refuse to allow negative energy to pull me backwards but that is the only way it can take you.  If you want to move forward, you must fill your self with positive energy.  I turn that negative energy into positive energy by being in touch with my core.  

Your core is your inner self.  That voice in the back of your mind.  It takes focus and consciousness to be aware of your core.  Close your eyes and visualize your inner self.  He or she looks just like you....a mini you.  He or she must be kept warm, safe and be loved. Talk to your inner self.  Do for yourself what you do for your friends.  Why do we find it so easy to embrace those we love, but not ourselves?  Literally give yourself a hug.  Tell yourself that you are worthy and a good person.  Breath deeply as you say it so that the words can penetrate deep inside yourself.  As you are hugging yourself and breathing deeply, visualize all of the things and people in your life that you are grateful for.  Your children, your significant other, the hot water you shower with, the roof over your head and the food and drink you will consume today.  What is your favorite food?  How do you feel when you eat it?  Who is your favorite person?How does it feel when he or she hugs you and holds you?  Focus on that energy and those good feelings.  Let those feelings overtake your core.  Let those feelings push the negative energy out.  Can you feel it?  YES!!!  That is it!!!  Ahhhhhhhhh......can you feel the smile start to creep onto your face?

Now that you know how to give your core what you need when life is overwhelming you, You understand that the pain is real, whether it is physical or emotional,  Do not let that pain define you though.  Live a good strong life,   The best revenge on those who hurt you, is success.  No one has the right to hurt you, but it happens.  Do not be a victim of it.  Be the hero in your own story and you will find your life going differently.

LIVE YOUR DREAMS, NOT YOUR FEARS.  For more on how UnLeash the KNOW can help you find your joy, contact me through here or on www.unleashtheknow.com  Programs and Workshops page.

Job Seeker Workshop - How long can you afford to be unemployed?

Too many people these days are struggling with unemployment.  People are being laid off for many reasons.  Companies are closing down, down sizing or moving to contractors.  Many times those contracts are also being shut down early or cancelled all together.  Let's face it, time are tough and better days are not expected in the immediate future.

What are employers looking for?  Who is getting the jobs or positions that you are perfect for but not getting that call for?

Do you know, that on average, there are 50 applicants for every position advertised?  Some positions may have as many as hundreds of applicants.   The right resume and cover letter are needed to even get you noticed.  The right interview skills are needed to keep you in their view.  and the right follow up is needed to get you that job.

Do you know how to network properly?  Do you know where to meet those who are doing the hiring?  Do you now how to speak to them in ways that will get their attention?

Unemployment is never fun or easy.  Looking for a job is a full time job but one where you are distracted by bills you cannot pay and knowing you are at risk of losing the things you have worked hard for.  You may be a new graduate with thousands of dollars in student loans and pressure to just get something!!

I have developed a new workshop just for you.  It will two days of very intensive work developing two versions of your resume, cover letters, follow up and interview skills.  You will receive unique tools and information geared to YOU.  These workshops will be in the Ottawa area for now but I can be booked for workshops anywhere or for a one on one program.   Invest in yourself and in your future.  Two days could change your future.

www.unleashtheknow.com  Register  Now for Latest Programs and Workshops.  Choose your date and I will confirm location at least one week before the workshop.  Register early for ensure your preferred date.

New Year Resolutions

I hope that everyone enjoyed your Christmas holiday, are enjoying Kwanzaa or enjoyed Chanukah.  Whatever it is that you celebrate, we all have  a new year coming up in just days and with it, New Year Resolutions.  Either weight loss, regular gym attendance, more travel, more income, more joy or finding love are likely on your list.  On January 1, we are all motivated and enthusiastic and determined to succeed.  By February 1, most of these resolutions have been put on a shelf until later….whenever later may be.  Sometime during the year, perhaps on your birthday, perhaps  with a significant change in your circumstances, you think about it again.  So I ask you, what will you DO about it?  How will you make a plan to go back to those resolutions and make a change?  You need a plan.

Let’s begin with a change of vocabulary.  The pressure of New Year Resolutions can be overwhelming.  Do not aim to begin on January 1, 2014.  Begin the day you are reading this.  Everyday is the first day of the rest of your life.  It is a new beginning every time you wake up in the morning.  Prepare yourself to wake up tomorrow and begin with gratitude.  Tomorrow is day one of your Gratitude Plan.  This plan applies to men and women, young or old, fit or fat, wealthy or poor.  Your Gratitude Plan includes acknowledging all that is right and good in your life now, leaving all of “the stuff” from the past in the past and looking forward to the amazing things life is bringing you in the future.

We must all be aware that the most perfect life you see someone else living, is not perfect to them.  Every human being has stresses, worries, fears and pain, both physical and emotional, at times.  So keeping that in perspective,  jealousy and envy can be tossed out the window.  Even when you believe that you are, as a friend of mine says,  ”so po that you cannot afford the second o or r” you have something to be grateful for.  A hot drink, sunshine, a hot shower or the clothes on your back.  This may sound very pie in the sky to you…I understand that.  Do yourself a favour though,  give it a try.  What do you have to lose after all?  Do it in the shower every morning.  As you feel the hot water hitting your body, close your eyes and feel the warmth and massaging effect of it.  Say thank you for it.  Having a coffee or tea when you get out?  Imagine it and say thank you again.  Do you have a nice thick towel to wrap yourself up in after the shower?  As you are still under the water, imagine the warmth and softness of the towel.  Does the soap smell good?  Be thankful as you absorb the positive things invading your senses.

By the end of day five, you will not have to search for things to be grateful for.  The list will keep you going after you have dried off and are getting dressed for your day.  Did you stub your toe or wake up late?  Do not let it take over your day.  Make your gratitude a ritual that nothing gets to take away.  You will see such a difference in how the rest of your day progresses that you will find yourself talking to others about it.  It will even negate any bad moments.  You will learn to recognize that they are indeed, only moments in time and are not a reflection of you, your day to come nor do they influence any other activities in your day.

What does this have to do with losing weight or finding love?  Set gratitudes for your body.  Add it to your routine.  When you are in your shower and feeling gratitude, visualize your body as you want it to be  Focus on it.  Feel it.  See it.  Okay….plan your food and exercise for the day with the picture of your new body in your mind.  With a little bit of discipline and focus, you will find yourself saying no to that extra serving of potatoes and saying yes to a walk around the block instead.  Getting into shape truly is a one day at a time and step by step process.  Be grateful for your body and your health.   See your healthy body and know that it is within you. This is a method which has simple to follow directions, easy to understand and puts virtually no stress on you.  You may even find yourself upping the ante sooner rather than later.  You will take a second look at biking in the good weather and getting out more and watching tv less.  Snacks will evolve into healthier choices.  What have you done?  You have created a gratitude frame of mind that leads to lifestyle changes.   The same applies to finding love.  How?

When you learn to recognize all of the good in your life, you will find yourself smiling more, glowing more and walking with more of a bounce in your step.  You will dress with more confidence too.  You will take that extra moment to add a little touch.   I personally make sure that I do not walk out the door in the morning with out earrings and perfume.  You will develop a more attractive and magnetic aura which will, in turn, attract more positive and more charismatic people around you.   Love will be attracted to you and you will be more open to seeing it when it is near you.

A Gratitude Plan is your new life, beginning on the new day.  It does not require  a new year and will not die over time.  It is simple, easy, user friendly and free.  Be grateful in anticipation of good things to come.  Feel those things now and acknowledge them now.   Too many people feel fear in anticipation of something bad potentially happening, even when the odds are they will not actually happen.  Practice anticipating good things instead and see the difference it makes.  Bad things might happen however they do not need to take over your life.  Leave the past where it belongs, under the lessons learned category.

For help with a Life Plan, taking your Gratitude Plan to the next level, contact andrea@unleashtheknow.com.  I will work with you to develop a program specific to you.  Life is to be lived.  Live your dreams, not your fears.

Self Awareness and Life Coaching

Self Awareness; The Value of Early Discovery

Self awareness is where our dreams come from, how we know what we feel, where our intuition resides and where opportunity lies. My clients must develop their sense of self awareness early on in the coaching process so that the direction and desire to succeed can be articulated and the path laid out to make the dreams reality.

Once self awareness is developed and the client has begun to “tune in” to him or herself, the realization that there are no limits, sets in.  We begin to recognize our strengths.  We can acknowledge all that we have already accomplished and therefore, all that can be accomplished.   Self awareness is the key that opens the door to the future.  Recognizing our strengths and our own power means that we can change the direction we are heading in and redirect our energy into positive outcomes and a greater quality of life.

Some within my client base suffer from chronic illnesses such as Fibromyalgia.  As I also live with it, I know and understand how it can turn one’s life upside down. I also know, after suffering with it for fifteen years, that self awareness has allowed me to reduce my medication by over 75%.   Self awareness teaches one to focus on specific parts of the heart and mind, redirecting the negative energy into positive energy, even pain can be reduced.   It has changed bad days and good days to good days and great days

Self awareness gives the individual the power to be in charge of their own life.  As stated by Steve Jones in the video “it puts them in the drivers seat”  A client who cannot or will not develop this, will have limited success in any coaching program.  An individual must be conscious of what their options are, what options they are acting on, the results of their actions and the lessons learned from those actions.  Too many people go through life in a fog in terms of conscious decision making, unclear and without learning about themselves.  This leads to repetition of mistakes, poor choices and remaining in the same “stuck” spot throughout their lives (if they are fortunate enough not to slip backwards).  Consciousness or self awareness wakes you up!!!  It makes you say “hold on….if I do this….this is likely to happen whereas if I do that….that is likely to happen.  I have always done things this way and it hasn’t been working well for me.  Now I know that doing it THAT way is more likely to have the results I am looking for”.

Self awareness does not mean letting others make decisions for you.  While there is value in the experiences and paths of loved ones and trusted friends, they are not living your life.  They generally do not have to live with the consequences of your actions and it is nearly impossible that anyone else knows every single thought or feeling you have.  They are often unaware or skeptical of your dreams and truest goals.  Accepting the value of the experience of others may be part of good decisions and moving forward, but without self awareness and consciousness, you end up living their lives and dreams.

Self awareness leads to being your authentic self and living your authentic life.    Your authentic self is who you are under all of the turmoil and stress and fears.  It is your strength and passion and joy. It is who you are under all of the stuff we accumulate from the day of our birth…until that moment….that realization….that we have one life and one self.  The freedom that comes with self awareness is the greatest gift a person can give themselves.  The earlier a client discovers it, the more success he or she will have and the further they will go in their dreams.  My role as a Life Coach is to show the client that who he or she is, that the dreams and goals that they hold deepest in their hearts, are possible and that knowing that and believing in that is the most difficult step in the process.  With self awareness, full consciousness of self, the limits of the client are sky high.  He or she will not give up when obstacles pop up, opinions of others will not break the spirit and the coaching program will become self directed and successful.

Leadership Principle number 13

While this principle is the 13th and final in my list of "no matter who you are and no matter where you are" principles, it is not the last key to great leadership by any means.  It is, in fact, only the beginning.

Leadership is about people.  People are the same everywhere....yet each one is different from the other.  We are all a collection of our experiences, our circumstances and the people around us, from our birth until our death.  But we are all human beings and want to protect the people we love, we want to feel valued in one way or another and we crave positive human interaction and touch.  We want our privacy protected and our rights respected.  We want to feel safe.  For some, work is simply a means to an end.  For a lucky few, work is not really work....it is fulfillment of a dream or a lifelong ambition. Some people do volunteer work over and above day to day work, some can only find the time and energy for that job to keep a roof over your head due to circumstances that seem out of their control.

Wherever it is that you work and whether it seems like work or not, there will be leaders.  You might not notice them as they are not always the ones in positions of power.     Some work places have those who call themselves leaders who believe that there job title and a university degree gives them power.  They believe they know everything and are always right.  That is not leadership.

Do not feel the need to be right all of the time.  No one is an expert on everything.  Be flexible and comfortable with that concept

Making mistakes is another human characteristic...it is how we learn and grow.    If we do not make mistakes, we cannot truly move forward as it is those who try and fail, that keep trying.  Be proud  of the fact that you have learned and grown and are moving forward.

Always keep those human beings around you in mind.  Always remember that what you feel is what others feel and that without humanity, there is very little left.  Be a leader...

For more on Leadership Principles and Programs, go to www.unleashtheknow.com   or write to info@unleashtheknow.com